College is not a match-making website where you will find someone worth spending the rest of your life with. There are a lucky few out there who are either in a long-term relationship right now or even engaged, but really college is about one thing: Getting what you need to get done, done.

Most of us have had boyfriends or girlfriends in high school that have either provided great bliss or pure horror stories. We have learned from those past relationships and we take the lessons learned and think, “Oh gosh, when I find the right person I’m going to be absolutely perfect for them.”

Kick that out of your head fast because a lot of people are not ready for a relationship.

“I’m not ready to settle down. I’m only 22,” said senior A.J Trentini. “I will take a girl out on a date but I won’t be boyfriend and girlfriend.” Half of the students here are struggling with full class loads and endless amounts of reading so their only action during the weekend is with their textbook.

I guarantee you will find one, maybe two people in a relationship who are bio-chem majors with an emphasis in pre-med.

Along with the full class loads they are also playing sports on campus, leaving any other free time unavailable. Practices typically held at 6 a.m. every day, weight training and meetings leave no room for a chance to even text someone they may be crushing on.

“I have no time during the week to do my homework, especially during season. I’m stressed out from all the stuff I have,” said sophomore Regals soccer player Taylor Will.

The other half of students are having too much fun being single. There are parties to go to, clubs to hit up, events to go “sober” to, and plenty of people to meet. Let’s face it, they aren’t thinking, “I’m going to find the love of my life here.” We are too young to find “the one.” We are at the age when we are truly finding our identity and ourselves.

We all seem to have false identities of ourselves and bringing someone into a relationship will just complicate your own life.

If you want to date in college, I encourage you to feel secure with yourself. If you love who you are, love where you are going and are confident in your life, then soon enough the right person to date will pop up.

“Being secure is a really important thing. You have to be secure with relationships. You have to have that trust,” said  Will.

I started my college years looking for some action. In the middle of it all, I struggled with realizing a lot about myself, changed myself accordingly so I could accept who I was and where I was going, instead of where imaginary Rafe thought he was going. Sure enough I landed myself a loving girlfriend and a relationship I have confidence in.

Go out on dates, go have fun, take some time to consider who you are and where you are going, and just leave the serious dating for later in life. We are in our peak right now, so take advantage of those hormones and the gym.

Rafael Padilla
Staff Writer
Published Oct. 17, 2012